The Three Questions of Seeing

The Three Questions at a glance

Makori's Three Questions are three short questions that Makori, the wandering teacher in Dr. Sénamé Agbossou's parable The Boy Who Learned to See, gives to the boy Tala to train Second Sight: the habit of seeing what is good in yourself, in others and in your world.

Makori did not begin Tala's training with a long lecture. He began with three questions.

In the story, Makori asks the questions in the second person ("What do you see in yourself that is good?"). Readers practise them in the first person.

1. 1. What do I see in myself that is good?

   This is often the hardest question. Many people can name their mistakes quickly, but struggle to name their goodness.

   Start small. Do not look for grand achievements. Look for qualities, intentions, efforts, and signs of growth.

   The first of Makori's Three Questions trains you to notice your own effort, growth and value, instead of reading yourself only through old stories of what you lack. Sénamé Agbossou calls it the question most people struggle with, because noticing your strengths is easily mistaken for arrogance. The book's argument is simple: you cannot see the goodness in others if you refuse to see it in yourself.

   At work: at the end of a difficult week, a manager writes one line: "I stayed calm when the deadline moved, and I asked the team for help early." The answer can be small. What matters is that it is true.

2. 2. What do I admire in others?

   This question trains your eyes to notice hidden gifts. It softens judgment and helps you see beyond behavior.

   Choose one person today. It may be someone you love, someone you work with, or someone who frustrates you. Look again. What can you sincerely admire?

   The second of Makori's Three Questions trains you to notice the intention behind someone's behaviour, not only the behaviour itself. Asked regularly, it shows the carefulness behind slowness, the loyalty behind stubbornness and the courage behind fear. It softens judgement and makes people feel seen.

   At home: a parent is irritated that a child takes a long time over homework. Asking "What do I admire in my child?" the parent notices that the child checks every answer twice, and names that care instead of the slowness.

3. 3. What do I see in my world that is possible?

   The First Sight often looks at life through fear: what could go wrong, what is missing, what may fail.

   The Second Sight does not deny difficulty. It looks for the door hidden inside the difficulty.

   Ask this question when you feel discouraged, stuck, or surrounded by problems. It helps you move from reaction to vision.

   The third of Makori's Three Questions trains you to look for openings, strengths and a way forward, where First Sight looks mainly for threats and risks. Instead of "What's the problem?", it asks "What could this become?"

   In a classroom: a teacher has a group that talks constantly. Asking "What is possible here?" the teacher sees a class that likes to discuss, and starts the next lesson with paired discussion rather than silent work.

How to practise Makori's Three Questions

Practise Makori's Three Questions once a day, in the morning or the evening, by writing one sentence in answer to each. Use them also in the moment: before reacting, before giving feedback, in a team meeting or at the dinner table. In The Boy Who Learned to See, the three questions work together: seeing your own good makes you less defensive, seeing the strengths of others makes relationships healthier, and seeing what is possible makes you more courageous. To go further, download the free reflection guide and sign up for the 7-Day Email Companion, which is also free. Afterwards, you can follow the guided version of the 30-Day Second Sight Challenge, a paid programme with a workbook and daily emails.